So I have Aspergers, I can’t pick up on subtle things, I struggle to understand why I should care and I often understand things in the wrong way? and I think about other things more so than the person I’m with. So how on earth am I supposed to have a relationship?
Well you can, It takes a lot of time and effort on both sides and for me I have had to try and understand a person (not easy at all) but I think I’m getting there.
Im sure a lot of people with Aspergers are happy without, but for me I wanted to be with someone so I could share what I do with them and learn from them. I got this and have been on one hell of a rough journey. But it is worth it to me.
Now I have learn’t how to think about others (sort of) and how not to act in groups (still putting it into practise) and I have also learnt that me + alcohol is a really bad idea when I cant keep up when sober…
At the end of the day there is a lot of work for the person who is trying to love you as well. they have to put up with your crazy ideas, your bluntness and your inability to care for any of their friends. but if they are truly worth all the effort then they will still be there for you, even when you mess up. and that is something I can honestly say is worth it.
For me I need to work on my ability to socialise and my ability to not be 100% Black & White when in a group, it will take time but Im sure I will find a way. I just hope I don’t go into my own world too much and appear like a person who just isn’t interested.
I know I care for the person I’m with more than anyone else, and I know I will never truly understand how much they care, but I hope I can get past this and just trust one more person properly.
I just had to choose if it was worth it. And I did.